P N C O

Mostly photography, with the occasional philosophical contemplation

Butterflies

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3: Butterflying my life

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I´m always amazed by all the beautiful butterflies. So delicately build and yet so agile in flight. They´re in our stomach for a reason. Tingling, joyful, exciting, almost too much too bear. And yet also very gentle, colorful and peaceful. They call to me in a way i can´t describe.

The most amazing part of the butterfly is its capability to transform. Starting as a small caterpillar, they morph into pupa before the final metamorphosis is completed. I often feel the same. One day someone said to me i was not yet showing who i really was and he compared me to a butterfly in pupa stage. Funny enough i sometimes feel like that. Knowing that it’s me who prevents the final transformation. Luckily every night i sleep under a blanket filled with butterflies.. and i’m working on transforming myself. I’ve come to realize it’s all about letting go. Letting go of my expectations, of thoughts, feelings and ideas about who i should or should not be.

In this way the butterfly becomes a powerful reminder to wake up to what’s actually here. Dealing with everything as it is, is so useful. At this moment there is no need to improve anything. Once the moment is here, it is all here. Nothing is left out. So i can rest and just enjoy whatever arises. If i make the transition or not is not even the point, cause everything i need is already here. I just need to recognize. Clearing my thoughts, creating space by being mindful and meditating, accepting.. all are part of the ongoing process of self(less) inquiry.

Searching for the truth has always led me to the same conclusion, whatever angle i used to tackle it. See the ego for what it really is. For me it’s the cocoon. It has its purpose and is very useful in my every day life, but it is not who i really am. The first time i recognized i was identifying myself as the cocoon, it was wild. I could feel the space which lay beyond. But also there was fear and anxiety. What would happen, once i let go of this cocoon, of this protection i had been carrying for so many years?

I’m still learning to let go of the cocoon. Every now and then i get the change to see through the holes which are now there and see the wild open spaciousness which lies ahead. The experiences have shown me that this spaciousness is my true home. Pure from the beginning, simple and full of love, wisdom and understanding. Which gives me the breathing space i need to deal with the cocoon which is still here. No longer it is necessary to fight it. As the caterpillar´s instinct tells it to create the cocoon, so i now know from deep down inside that everything is ok. I know it´s safe to let go. With the cracks appearing in the cocoon, i can taste more and more of the freedom which lies ahead of me. And with that i´ve learned that death too is another transformation.

Am i ready to let go?

Flowers!

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Today lots of flowers for you! Hortensia’s are magnificent at the moment and so is the Butterfly-bush. Had fun doing quick edits, since i knew i had many more to come.. but as it is now bedtime, a great moment to stop and enjoy the result(s) 🙂

Holly Blue

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Blue

Little Blue

Blue delight, resting after your flight
As you are frolicking ever playful in the air
Though you are little, you have so much flair
Blue knight, you’re such a delicate sight

Brown Argus

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Brown Argus

Little butterfly

Thinking about you
I wonder can I find you?
And you just showed up!

This haiku is actually describing what happened yesterday at the local children’s farm. I was wondering whether i could find an Argus butterfly in a field of flowers and the moment i had this thought, i saw (what turned out to be) a Brown Argus. Really cool small butterflies with a blue touch. And so i’m very happy with the result 🙂

Red Admiral

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Atalanta closed Atalanta open

First of all, what a cool name for this butterfly! In Dutch this species is called Atalanta – after the Latin name, but Red Admiral sounds very cool 🙂 Today I’ve got two photographs, one with the wings closed and one with the wings opened. Luckily the butterfly was buzzing around my head and landing close by so i could should both. My personal preference goes out to the wings closed, since this side of the wings is so incredibly patterned and colored. And yet, with it’s wings fully open, it’s also a beauty.. why would i make a choice anyway lol..

Found a new spot

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Yesterday i wandered away after a tough day to relax myself a bit. So i took off with the camera to a sight where the kingfisher was spotted. Along the way i kinda guessed my way through and i ended up in a nice and new spot in my hometown. I realize there is so much more to explore in my surroundings 🙂 Please scroll down and enjoy!

To start of with a picture, i choose this one:
Flow in the creek_klein
There is a nice creek flowing through the forest i visited. I could easily see why a kingfisher would want to be there. Lovely fresh water with a lot of great fishing water.

After that i sat for a while enjoying the silence of the forest when i started to focus some more on mushrooms, which are very early this year. Here are some of the shots i took:
Mushroom B&W_klein
 
Mushroom_klein
 
Mushroom2_klein
 
Mushroom6_klein
 
Paddenstoel op bosgrond_klein
 
It was nice to be out with the macro telezoom lens again. This time i noticed how much i have missed being outside in nature playing with the camera. It was like coming home again, not having to do anything but wander in nature and enjoy its presence.

To finish here are a couple more (abstract) pictures from yesterday and the day before. Including big spiders 😉
Butterfly4_klein

Creek in the city_klein

Spider in web_klein

Spider in web2_klein

Verweerd Kruis_klein